Reflections of a BW take 2

Well here I am posting again... My sweet friends, is anyone still out there in the blog world who cares about the Willeys? Who knows, but I guess I can start posting for myself and the Grandparents any how.

Today I ran into a dear friend who I don't see often enough and she asked me how the Bishop's Wife was doing. Ha Ha. It gave me a little moment of reflection over what I have learned over the last year and a half. So here it goes.

1. Being the BW is a privilege. I struggle with saying this. Don't take this the wrong way. I'm not bragging. I don't think we are so awesome because my husband has this calling. Those who see a Bishop's calling as something to aspire to are frankly, clueless. It is a ton of work and your opportunity to offend others is so readily available. But those who would say I never want my husband to be Bishop are clueless too. Watching someone you love learn and develop as they are a tool in the Lord's hand is amazing. Serving the Lord is a blessing. Am I alone a lot, yes. Do we share less with each other about our days, yes. But seeing my husband grow as he receives frequent revelation that he acts on daily, is a privilege.

2. Being alone is easy when it is for the right reasons. Don't get me wrong; putting kids to bed alone is not easy. And when my husband is gone for work that gets old real fast.

But I never resent when my husband is gone because he is serving as the Bishop. Why? Well think about it. How much do you love the people in your ward? Maybe not everyone, but those you know well. Wouldn't you drop everything to serve someone you love? If you knew that someone's testimony was wavering, if someones marriage was failing, if someone child wandering. Wouldn't you be there to love and support them? Wouldn't your scripture study be centered around finding something to bring them, faith, peace, or hope?

I have come to learn that when my husband is gone meeting with someone as their Bishop. This is exactly what he is doing. They need him, well not really him. They need the Lord and my husband gets to be His representative to help others take full advantage of the atonement.

If I knew what was going on in the lives of the members of my ward I would do anything to help them. But I don't, and I don't need too. I just need to remember that when my husband steps out of my house to step in the church, he is going to bless someone who I love. And that makes putting kids to bed alone easier.

3. You love those whom you serve, and the Bishop serves the whole ward, and as the BW that love spreads to you too. My capacity to love the members of my ward has grown expoentially.

4. People are relieved when your children act horribly, in sacrament, as long as you haul them out to avoid detracting from the spirit. Guess what, the Bishop's Family is normal. My children argue, they take their shoes off in the chapel when I'm not looking, and my 3 year yells out "I don't want to go to church!" That is just the way it is. I'm trying to survive sacrament meeting the same as everyone else. And that is okay. People are way more concerned about there own toddler to notice mine. If by chance they are judging me. That's okay too. Someday they will be in my shoes, and they will understand then.

5. I am clueless to what is going on in the ward. Of course to anything confidential but also about things that aren't. I had a friend ask me. "I've always wondered how much the Bishop's wife knows about what is going on." Frankly nothing. The most I know is what time my husband expects he will be home on Sunday for dinner. And I didn't even know that today. Unless it is in the Relief Society email, I don't know about. Which includes all High Priest activities and service projects, and who is pregnant. :)

Last Sunday, was Mother's day. I had a great day. My husband was home for most of it. It seems foreign to have him home on a Sunday. I hope that doesn't sound awful. Brian was sustained into the Bishopric 4 years ago on Mother's Day. Sometime in those years having him gone on Sunday just became life. When you receive a call like this, you feel a lot of pressure to be perfect. My first Sunday alone on the bench was tricky. I never thought I could do it alone. Samantha at age 2 gave me this look that said I can do whatever I want and you can't stop me. She was right and I was terrified. But then life just becomes life and you don't really think about it anymore. You serve, you struggle, you survive, and then you just live. And your life is blessed. I think it is that way with any calling. You feel inadequate because you are, but as you push forward and do your best, your capacity increases and you grow.